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Barney: "I am not a smoker. I only smoke in certain situations: post-coital, when I'm with Germans, coital, birthdays, to annoy my mom, pre-coital, on a sailboat..."
Ted: "Why are you smoking right now?"
Barney: "I'm always pre-coital, Ted."
Marshall becomes obsessed with saving the environment after seeing a documentary on garbage. Ted runs into The Captain, Barney admits he has feelings for a woman.